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Substance abuse question

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by BobbyBrown, Mar 31, 2018.

  1. BobbyBrown

    BobbyBrown Member

    I'm not addicted to any one drug, I just like to to drugs in general. I don't even really have an addictive personality, I am very disciplined in every part of my life, even the drug abuse part, to an extent. It wasn't untill recently I tried to clean up for a a hair drug test, I realized I couldn't be clean for more than a week, and that whole week I was drinking excessively, and I went back to me normal pot regimen, because that definitely wasn't nearly as destructive.

    I'm a functioning substance abuser, mind you. I have a job, I work hard and everyone loves me there. I don't have to do drugs, IL carry some pot or some Adderall with me if I need to chill, or hype up, but I don't need drugs to work. But I a lot of times I'll smoke in the morning, and when I get home I'll start taking pills, and smoking more. My few days off are a blur, and my nights out with friends, forget out it. I have the need to take large amount of drugs and alcohol, and weed and mix them All together, untill I'm getting dragged out of the place by security.

    I'm just wondering if there's a word for this problem I have. I guess it's just a general substance abuse problem. Im not physically addicted to anything. I just like to do drugs to drain everything out I suppose.
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2018
  2. patrice

    patrice Member

  3. patrice

    patrice Member

    Hi Bobby. Thanks for sharing. I believe there is a name for your condition. Alcoholic. I too have taken various drugs in my past and when I couldn't find any or ran out I drank a lot. I started my journey to hell with alcohol at age 14. then I found prescription drugs. then I got in trouble. Then I went to treatment. Then I recovered. No drugs that aren't dr ordered and no alcohol since 2002. My suggestion is to check out AA. That's what keeps me sober to this day. At least go to 1 meeting.
    All the best to you
    Lostboy8731 and True concern like this.
  4. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @BobbyBrown hey there! thanks for sharing... there may not be one single "term" that describes your situation... addictive tendencies for sure. rather than worry about a name, maybe start asking "why"... why do you need to alter your consciousness? is it avoid withdrawal symptoms? (your body is dependent on mind altering substances)

    is it to avoid emotional pain? old wounds? trauma? childhood trauma you never dealt with?

    i'm not so keen on believe addiction is a "disease".... but i do find in many peopel, it's progressive. so a year or five years from now, unless you start digging and "doing some inner work", it's likely to be worse. less functioning. more misery... you know.

    have you ever went to a "good" counselor for a period of time? just curious.
    Lostboy8731 likes this.
  5. NY_Upstate518

    NY_Upstate518 Member

    There's a few words actually. Polydrug Abuse (Abuse of many drugs) and Psychological Addiction. You sound like those whom I've known to fall into addiction as well as myself personally. All addicts start as functioning addicts. We all had a steady supply of income to fuel our massive drug habits. This stuff doesent happen overnight. Symptoms of Psychological addiction are the feeling you can't go without them, whether it be a day, week, year and getting anxious and scared when thinking about a future of not using drugs or the process of no longer using drugs. It's when you justify using one drug instead of another because it's " not as bad" as the other, it's telling yourself you can quit at anytime but just don't want to. It's when you haven't used drugs for a few days,weeks, months, years etc. And tell yourself that now it's ok because it's been so long, you deserve to treat yourself since you've been so good. The short of it is that my advice to you would be to look into Polydrug Abuse, Physical Addiction and Psychological Addiction and most of all to never think for a minute your above being or becoming an addict because I promise you every single one of the hundreds of millions of addicts have all thought the same exact things to ourselves and you are no different by any means and I hope you don't have to learn the hard way. Good luck you got this.
    Josh111187 and True concern like this.
  6. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

  7. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    @BobbyBrown I have no problem saying I'm an addict,however like someone above mentioned we all start of by saying im not-im in control.Now i will post my story of a downward spiral to highlight how fast it could get out of hand and how bad it can get before you even know it.This is my story of addiction.I was born in the early 80's at the age of six year's old i was diagnosed with that time there was a new F.D.A.approved drug by the name of Ritalin.At first it seemed to be a miracle pill,I was on this pill until the age of 18 at that time i decided i was no longer going to take this pill and it began just under a year passed and someone said "Have you ever tried crystal"which i had not at that time but i tried it and instantly noticed that it was 100% the same effect i got from Ritalin only difference was it lasted longer,or seemed to but honestly it was probably the quantity i was doing was greater than that of Ritalin i struggled with meth on and off for roughly 20 year's,not only meth but i was as well consuming 750ml of Jack Daniel's a day plus a 12 pack of beer.For those who don't know when you mix the two you don't appear to get drunk which is very deadly because infact you do get drunk however you don't realise it until it's too late meaning alcohol poisoning.I experienced this a few times and actually died on a hospital bed due to this fact,it took 3 hits with a defibrillator to restart my heart and i was told the only reason I was hit 3 times was because i was only 19 year's old,but usually after the second time if your heart doesn't restart you are then pronounced dead,but a nurse pleaded with the try one more time and he did and my heart started back up.I didn't know at the time but that nurse was actually the mother of the lead singer of Sublime who just lost her son to a heroin overdose.I am forever grateful for that nurse without her plea i would be another statistic.Unfortunately I didn't quite using drug's at that time i just traded substances.I started abusing pain pills heavily and increased that addiction to catastrophic proportions,it got so bad i started injecting heroin which i quickly traded for oxycontin because it was much stronger than heroin.I abused fentanyl as well but nothing compared to the oxycontin.At my worst i was injecting 240-320mg's of oxycontin a day,feeling i wouldn't survive another month i decided to seek help.I'm poor and i come from poor parent's so my options were limited,i ended up at a methadone clinic for help slowly decreasing my extremely high tolerance.At the clinic i had an interview with a drug addiction counselor and an addiction physician,i was hoping for good news but what i heard shock me to my core.I was told by both the same thing,"Sir we are sorry to tell you but your addiction and tolerance is beyond the point of return,whether you quit or continue either way you cannot survive you have if your lucky a month to live"My heart sank and i decided at that moment if i was going to die i would die trying.I went home and prayed and then i called my wife into the room to tell her the news.At that moment i apologized to her told her how much she meant to me and made her promise if i didn't make it she would move on re marry and live a happy life and she noded yes.After that i quite cold turkey and suffered pain and sickness i cannot describe,for 27 straight day's i did not leave the bedroom,i did not eat,i did not sleep,i hallucinated,i screamed in intense unimaginable pain,i lost over 50 pound's in that time frame and had to be rushed to the hospital 3 time's where they would rehydrate me and try to give me pain shots to stall the detox which i refused.On day 28 I took my first steps after i quite and by the grace of God i survived and this May im married 18 year's to my beautiful wife and guardian angel.This is the first time I've shared my story of addiction and i did it for one reason alone,i want everyone to know i understand what you are going through and no matter how bad it gets there is hope.I'm here for each and everyone of you,if you ever need someone to talk to,if you ever feel no one understands im all ears and i do understand.Stay Strong We're rooting for you
    Josh111187 likes this.
  8. Peaceisme

    Peaceisme Member

    Hello I have a question. O take tramadole and my doctor has given me Norco in the past. I didnt take them all but kept a few. Well I took one a few days before I saw doctor. It showed up in my urine and my refill I got that was on the bottle was cancelled. Am I in trouble even though he gave me Norco before and didnt take them all right away.
  9. True concern

    True concern Moderator

    No you're not in trouble.With the way the law's have been changing and opioid addiction now being recognized as a National emergency in the U.S.atleast Dr's are being extra careful as they are on the hot seat for helping to cause the growing epidemic of prescription opioid addiction.Alot of factors come into play now like your current history with these medications and honestly i believe that pill pusher Dr's are getting nervous,which is the point as this particular addiction has destroyed many lives spanning over a say a 15 year period,however Tramadol is there new go-to pain pill of prescribing it is important to not mix them as the base substance's between the seperate pill's effectively add deeper addiction issue's.So no trouble just bring it to your Dr attention and explain the situation honestly and it should be relatively easy to resolve.Are you in chronic pain?Are you waiting for or recovering from surgery?
  10. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

  11. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Peaceisme hi there. thanks for reaching out. I think you will be fine. trueconcern has given some great advice. I hope you have a beautiful day!
  12. Josh111187

    Josh111187 Community Champion

    Yes, there is a word for this. It is just plain old normal addiction. I'm sorry to say that but everything you've said is what everyone else who has become addicted and hit the proverbial "rock bottom" has said. I was also a functional addict for a long time...about 11 years. The last two of which my own fiance never even new I was using a needle. Even on the needle I was thinking I had it under control. Its the drugs just tricking you into thinking this.
    You've already said you are blacking out. That's a huge red flag for addiction and dependancy. Please listen to all the above excellent advice and stop before itgets worse.
    It's very true drug use ends in one of these three ways, jails,institutions,or death. By the way during the time when I thought I had it under control I had had already been to jail twice.
    Addiction will lie to you in every possible and suttle way it can.
  13. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Josh111187 well said.... at the very least, addiction will confine one to misery.....
  14. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    You speak the truth, @Josh111187.