There is no other way to put it, CRACK IS THE DEVIL! It's impossible for the non addict to understand the addicts addiction. I see this strong, hardworking man give in to this substance over and over again. He's lost jobs, mental health, cars, and now me. He says he just wants me to understand him but I can't. All I see is insanity. It's insane that even facing jail, death, institutions he will still find a way to maneuver a hit. He has told me that even while he's doing it he doesn't want to be doing it but can't stop himself. How is that even possible? I'm laying here watching this beautiful man, whose brought me such joy, sleep away another week binge, hurt and confusion are all I feel. How can he not value his life as much as I do? I would give anything for him to have this demon removed from within him. About 10 years ago he was shoot 6 times. The shooter actually walked over top of him and tried to shoot him again and the gun jammed. A month in the hospital, learning to walk, talk, and eat again but he don't believe that he is meant for something great. He doesn't think that he has a purpose. I just don't understand. Is there a way for someone like me to understand the struggle and the addiction he faces? I want to understand, I really do but like I said, it's pure insanity. Can anyone offer any advice to help me understand?