An American Addiction Centers Resource

New to the Forums?Join or

Today is a Bad Day

Discussion in 'General Substance Abuse Discussion' started by PingPongCall, Jan 28, 2016.

  1. PingPongCall

    PingPongCall Active Contributor

    It's my wife's birthday today and I have absolutely no money to buy her a gift or even take her out to dinner. This may not seem like, much to a lot of people, but it absolutely destroys me inside. It's bad enough my birthday was a few days ago and she felt bad that she couldn't get me anything, but this is simply devastating to me.

    Just thought you should know.
  2. djdrug

    djdrug Community Champion

    I've been there. You don't need a ton of money and you don't need to take her out. Get a cupcake, a candle and cook something for her. You have paper, pen and the internet - make her a heart shaped card or something. Dude, there is plenty to do.

    Also, use the internet to earn extra cash. Head over to beermoney on reddit to find a few easy ways. You can easily earn like $10 a day, which translates to $300 extra bucks a month, enough to have an awesome dinner, right? :)
  3. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    What of a hand-made gift? They are the best option when you have no money to buy a gift. If it's not too late you could take a look around the net and find out what you can make her. I'm sure she'll appreciate it. It's the thought that counts.

    Take a look at this:
    They've got some good free gift ideas on the site.
  4. L_B

    L_B Community Champion

    You shouldn't feel bad. You know she understands. It is not about the material things. Just plan a nice, quiet evening together, snuggling and enjoying each others company. Its the simple things in life that are the best. I like the ideas that Rainman suggested to. Just make her feel extra special on her special day. No need to spend money or feel bad because you don't have the money to spend. You have each other and that alone is the best gift of all.
  5. pwarbi

    pwarbi Community Champion

    You don't have to spend money for you to show your wife what she means to you. While buying gifts is great, it's not that important, and I'm sure she understands the situation that your in at the moment so will be happy, with something small.

    Even something like you making dinner or doing her jobs around the house for a day so she can relax would mean a lot.
  6. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @PingPongCall... Material things aren't necessary to express your love for someone on their birthday. Take some time to write a love letter to your wife. Tell her how much she means to you. Tell her why you love her. That would be the greatest gift of all. Or take a shot at writing her a poem. Poems aren't that difficult. They don't even have to rhyme. I'm a firm believer that a message from the heart is way more special than an item from the store. Don't be down on yourself, my friend. Just take some time and create something special for your wife.

    P.S. Happy birthday, Mrs. PingPongCall!
    kgord likes this.
  7. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    I agree with deanokat, there are things you can do even with no money. The best gifts come from the heart anyway. How about a nice foot massage or a bubble bath...? Offering to make dinner is another thing I bet she would appreciate. Use your imagination..I bet you will come up with something great. The poem thing is a great idea. Tell her Happy Birthday from us!
  8. Coolkidhere

    Coolkidhere Community Champion

    My husband does not even like material gifts. You know what he likes? Love letters, crafts and anything made from the hearts. So you can try that as well, I'm sure your wife will love them. After all, who writes love letter nowadays anymore? That's right, not a lot of people write their feelings on paper. It's a unique and free way of sending your love to your special someone.

    You can also give her a massage or even prepare her dinner. You can try doing housework for her. There are tons of things you can do that are absolutely free but screams "I love you!" Be creative, let your imagination work and let her be amazed. Good luck!
    deanokat likes this.
  9. serenity

    serenity Community Champion

    Just cook for her and do the chores that she usually does to show your love, the fact that she wasn't able to buy you a gift as well means that she will be able to understand your financial situation, so no pressure there.
    deanokat likes this.
  10. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    It doesn't have to be an expensive gift. Be a little old-fashioned, and give her a letter. That would really put a smile on her face. You could just also cook her favorite dish for dinner. I am pretty sure she would appreciate your effort.
    deanokat likes this.
  11. ashwee5991

    ashwee5991 Member

    Don't beat yourself up! My husband and I are young and we've been married for almost five years. There are many years that we haven't had any money to do anything. We would often just wr0te each other a little love note, and spend the day together. I know it can be difficult not to be upset because I'm sure you feel like your wife deserves the world, but I'm sure she would love the quality time with you.
    deanokat likes this.
  12. PingPongCall

    PingPongCall Active Contributor

    I done did it. We spent the day playing Skyrim and Tomb Raider......It was rad. Neither of us worked and everything was wonderful. We also had hamburger meat and Doritos for dinner. It's like it was ten years ago, I was really happy with how things turned out.
    anorexorcist and deanokat like this.
  13. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    I love it, @PingPongCall!!! Big kudos to you for making your wife's birthday special!! You really don't need money to show someone how much you love them. I'm really proud of you and am happy things turned out so well. :)
  14. irishrose

    irishrose Community Champion

    It just goes to show that even the simple things can really make a difference in someone's day! While gifts and going out to dinner can be nice once in a while, spending time with someone and doing something with them that they enjoy are always great gifts. Time spent with loved ones means a lot more than money spent. :)
    deanokat likes this.
  15. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    I hope you're doing better today! We all have bad days, but we just have to keep moving and going forward! :)
  16. ReadmeByAmy

    ReadmeByAmy Community Champion

    I always believe that money or material things can't buy real happiness that is why for me it doesn't matter if my husband will not give me a gift to me on my special day. What is important is the thought of remembering me and his presence and that we are together on that day. Usually we just go hiking together because we both love nature and the green scenery and it always gives us happiness whenever we see this things around. Simple things for a simple life.
  17. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I can tell you as a wife that the things my husband has done for me for special occasions that meant the most were never the material things. Honestly, we could be sitting on the floor in our living room, spending time with each other and eating toast and I'd still be happy if he was spending quality time with me and telling me how much I meant to him. Material things are just that - things.
    deanokat likes this.
  18. Mayoress

    Mayoress Active Contributor

    This is so sweet of you. The fact that you are so worried and sad that you couldn't get her anything is enough of a birthday present if you ask me. I wish she could read this and see how much you care about her and things that matters to her. Why not just let her know how you feel. Show her that you are there for her. That should mean more to her than anything money can buy.
  19. PingPongCall

    PingPongCall Active Contributor

    I don't ever want her to read this stuff. The only reason I don't mind you all reading it is because I don't know any of you.
  20. PingPongCall

    PingPongCall Active Contributor

    On that note, I've actually been doing much better. I got a writing opportunity recently that I think will really be able to turn things around if I can do it.
    deanokat likes this.