I have been on high doses of tramadol for years (I have major depression, was in an accident and have bad arthritis and it's the only thing that made me feel better). I was on 800mg/day for over a year, then tapered down successfully to 500mg then 4oomg for a year and then the last 3 months tried to taper off and got down to 100 in morning and 100 in evening before I ran out of pills. I had been getting them in Mexico and I haven't been down since running out and have nothing at home to run to. I did have some cough syrup with codeine that I lost...maybe one dose. I can't find it and it's taking everything I have not to ransack my house looking for it because I know it's here. I took my last dose on 2/27 Wed so Wed night, Thurs and Fri was HELL! Haven't slept a wink and the restless legs are the WORST! Now I'm having cramps, irritability and cold sweats. I'm a single mom with 3 teenagers and I rescue kittens that need to be fed every 3 hrs. I don't want to tell anyone because I went through withdrawal 11 years ago and I don't want to hear the disappointment. I can't go back on it, I just want to get clean and healthy. My depression came back in October and it's like the perfect storm hitting on all fronts right now. I have been unemployed but found a temporary part time job online that pays good. I'm afraid I'll lose it because I can't sit still to work on the computer! How much longer is it going to be unbearable like this? I don't know if I can do it....part of me just wants to rip my skin off and the other part wants to run back down to Mexico. But I DO NOT want to go through this all over again so my choice is to get more and avoid the withdrawal for the rest of my life or just keep continuing with the detox because I already have 3 days under my belt. These symptoms are hell and I don't know how much longer I can manage. I'm scared.