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Wanna be clean, wanna mix a shot

Discussion in 'Methamphetamine / Meth' started by Noflexzone, Apr 7, 2019.

  1. Noflexzone

    Noflexzone Member

    I’m like if this helps one person I’m glad I told my honest story. I’ve lived this illusion life. I’m ready to move on, I’m weak sometimes tho
    deanokat likes this.
  2. Noflexzone

    Noflexzone Member

    Thank you! I know I can beat it
    Dominica and deanokat like this.
  3. Joshstillclean

    Joshstillclean Stupidity Exists - Fact.

    I know you need your weekend to get off your bum and get extroverted yeah!
    Not your exact words but close to it...point is I don't want you to worry about replying.
    I just wanted to say since I've been at home and doing catch up reading I came across this and you are so real here.

    In so many posts you have valuable advice and are cheerful sounding, but something about this, when you said "when I was struggling with severe depression...the only thing I enjoyed was walking, so I walked twice a day....I think it helped....."

    Im not sure why, mabey because I read your book and blog, but that was real. Not to say that everyone of your posts are anything but real, but it was kind of like what you said the other day to me ; "we are not all so, not really." (and you say more)
    But it's almost as if that and this was said while looking up at the ceiling in deep reflection about some past event.
    Making your words carry so much emotional weight...
    I'm ranting but this did "resonate"(if I can steal one of your words) with me...
    And I know it wasn't meant for me but I appreciated it anyway @Dominica.
    deanokat likes this.
  4. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    @Joshstillclean hey you! thanks for your reply.... i drove 14 hours to NC yesterday... so wow, my bum is needing to get walking today!! :)

    you make me smile. i tend to be quite contemplative. i have certainly had "emotional weight" (nice term). i mean we are not all so different in terms of experiencing emotional pain. i'm a far sight better than i have been at different periods of my life, but i still have painful emotional days...fears...regrets...wanting to numb out...frustration...setbacks..

    i think we all do.

    but i also have a whole lot of great days, happy moments, hope, courage, etc.

    i also work my butt off doing what i call the "inner healing work". not perfectly, but there's always something in me that wants to be better, show up better, grow, expand, heal, etc. and sometimes i need help :)

    i'm in my head a lot. and i do love to write, as things come out better when i write. if i start talking, words get jumbled lol. but i would love to become a great story teller.

    i hope you had a great weekend. i forgot what part of georgia you lived in...but thought of you when i was driving through yesterday.
    deanokat and Joshstillclean like this.
  5. Joshstillclean

    Joshstillclean Stupidity Exists - Fact.

    Hi I'm glad you made it to n.c. safely.
    I dont live as far north anymore. I moved to the farm, and decide I like it better here anyway, its where I grew up. Anyway its south of Atlanta and north of Columbus. In a patch of farmland. I can get to Atlanta in an hours drive though. So if I had to associate myself with any city it would be Atlanta still because that's about the biggest place in the southeast most people have heard of. And I still go there to do business stuffs.
    But I do like being away from the major highways and not being able to hear traffic.
  6. Dominica

    Dominica Recovery Advocate @ Moving Beyond Codependency Community Listener

    atlanta... if i could avoid that city en route here, that'd be amazing. haha. atlanta is the main reason i travel through on sundays. less traffic :) and that's great you are in the country. that's the best place to be, in my opinion!
    deanokat and Joshstillclean like this.
  7. Joshstillclean

    Joshstillclean Stupidity Exists - Fact.

    And not a far drive if wanted to spend the weekend at the beach!-
    Which I often do...
    Agreed Atlanta traffic sucks!