I have a friend who seemed like the nicest person ever. Over time he has shown some scary behaviors. He accuses me of talking to other men and being interested in other men. One evening we were out shopping and he got mad and said I made a fool of him because I wouldn't walk next to him. The store aile are small and we couldn't possibly walk side by side. He went to his vehicle really mad so I paid for my stuff and went out there. On the way back to his place he said some of the most horrific things about me and my character. I am a single mom of 2 teenage daughters. I have no history of promiscuity. I go to school, am on a drug and alcohol prevention committee for my daughters school, work and take care of my amazing daughters. I told him from the beginning my girls are my number 1 priority and school was right after that. He pleaded for another chance professing his love and promising to never so that again. He told me he had been sober for almost 4 years and I recently found out he relapsed for a day 6 months ago. He routinely makes accusations and seems to try to start fights with me. He seems paranoid at times and doesn't care to sit around and just watch a movie. He has some really grandiose thinking. Other than that.....he tells me how amazing I am and how smart, beautiful, what a great Mom I am, and how much he loves me and apologizes for these behaviors. I recently told him I'm done with this relationship and he's begging and promising it will never happen again. He scares me. I thought maybe he had a mood disorder or something. His eyes do look ' wide open'. That dear in the headlight look. I believe He has much good in him until he has episodes of accusations etc. He has a history of cracked use also. One time he took a shower at the lake in the shower house and when he came out he had what looked like chewing tobacco near his upper lip and chin. I'm really concerned and feel so naive. Please she'd some light. Thank you!
Well, first of all, from what I've read you are a great woman and amazing mother and don't let anyone tell you any different! If he was a chronic long term user it could have changed his brain chemistry. My mom is going through that with my dad, he had drug induced paranoid schizophrenia. He thinks every one is out to get him and gets mad about the dumbest things, like really mad, to the point it's embarrassing. But, if you think he's relapsed look for little things like balls of burnt aluminum foil in the trash can and broken up pens or straws. If he's trying to hide his use from someone he's living with, that's probably the method he'd use to smoke it, so he can just throw it away after he's done smoking. Or if he is using a pipe, look for empty lighters, smoking meth uses up lighters like crazy. Smoking one good lump of dope can use up all the fluid in a Bic lighter, it will melt a cheap lighter and break it very fast. Meth smokers always have tons of empty lighters. If he's snorting it, just look at his nose, it'll be runny a lot and chapped, even bleed sometimes. If he's shooting it look for track marks or burnt spoons, with black stuff on them. Unfortunately, meth is one of those drugs that can be used almost anyway imaginable. So, it can be hard to tell and meth addicts keep that wide-eyed fidgety look even years after they stop, if they were heavy users. I'm sorry you're going through this it is really hard emotionally when people you love behave this way. I wish the best for you. If it comes down to it purchase an at-home drug test. But, meth only stays in the system around 72 hours, so you'll have to be quick and if he's high when you bring it up, it could go very badly. People are very unpredictable while high on meth.
Thanks a bunch for your feedback. Fortunately we aren't married and don't live together. I worry about his impulsively and obsessive behavior. I am so grateful I seen these behaviors early on our friendship. I'm really grateful that God has his ways of protecting us from our own bad choices and judgement of character.
Wow I'm sorry you are going through this. It definitely sounds like it could be either a mood disorder or drugs based on what you have said. It would be good to see how things progress and make sure you are protecting yourself in the relationship. If you start to find him disappearing a lot, acting radically different when returning, money disappearing, breaking promises/dates a lot, these could be signs. Definitely if you find any paraphernalia anywhere, it could easily be in his car or on his person even if you don't go to his house much. Make sure to take care of yourself first!
I was able to tell that my cousin was doing meth because he was never sleeping. He was up for days and I knew before it got to the point that he had meth mouth and pock marks all over his face. He didn't pick his face until later when he thought bugs were crawling around on his skin.
Thanks to each of you for sharing your knowledge and kind words. I sure appreciate everyone taking the time to respond. I feel the support which gives me the strength I need to work through this and makeven the best decision for my daughters and myself.
Nice to know that your priority is your daughters and they should be. Right that make the best decision for them and for yourself. Being paranoid for me is a one sign of being on drugs just like having hallucinations. Also I think observing physical appearance can somehow reveal if a person is an addict or not.
Keep an eye out for stimulant psychosis that can sometimes occur with meth use. It can cause serious and lasting damage.
First of all, I'm really sorry that you're going through this and I really hope things do get better. Some of the signs that you've mentioned more or less indicates that he could be using meth. Though, this could also be just one of our gut-feelings gone wrong.
Тhе sуmрtоms оf mеthаmрhеtаmіnе аddісtіоn wіll vаrу wіldlу аmоng іndіvіduаl usеrs. Vаrіаbіlіtу іs duе, іn раrt, tо thе dіffеrіng gеnеtіс mаkеuр оf еасh реrsоn аs wеll аs thе durаtіоn оf mеth аbusе, thе аmоunt usеd, аnd thе frеquеnсу іn whісh mеthаmрhеtаmіnеs аrе usеd. Соmmоn sуmрtоms оf mеthаmрhеtаmіnе аddісtіоn іnсludе thе fоllоwіng: Мооd sуmрtоms: Еuрhоrіа Оvеrаll sеnsе оf wеllbеіng Dерrеssіоn Аnхіеtу Веhаvіоrаl sуmрtоms: Моuntіng lеgаl рrоblеms Рrеоссuраtіоn wіth оbtаіnіng, usіng, аnd rесоvеrіng frоm mеthаmрhеtаmіnе usе Ѕосіаl іsоlаtіоn Ніdіng drug usе frоm оthеrs Dаngеrоus, rіskу bеhаvіоrs Іmрulsіvеnеss Unехрlаіnеd fіnаnсіаl рrоblеms Моuntіng lеgаl рrоblеms Іnсаrсеrаtіоn Іntеrреrsоnаl rеlаtіоnshір рrоblеms Vіоlеnt bеhаvіоrs Арреtіtе dерrеssіоn Віngе/сrаsh раttеrn оf аbusе Аggrеssіоn Rіskу sехuаl bеhаvіоrs Тwеаkіng – іntеntlу-fосusеd аttеntіоn Рhуsісаl sуmрtоms: Тrеmblіng аnd shаkіng Νаusеа аnd vоmіtіng Іnsоmnіа Тоlеrаnсе Аddісtіоn “Меth mоuth” Ореn sоrеs Наіr lоss Lоss оf skіn еlаstісіtу Dесrеаsеd blооd flоw thrоugh thе bоdу’s tіssuеs Vаsосоnstrісtіоn Тасhусаrdіа Lіvеr dаmаgе Ехtrеmе rіsе іn соrе tеmреrаturе оf bоdу Рsусhоlоgісаl sуmрtоms: Νеrvоusnеss Rереtіtіvе bеhаvіоrs Dіsоrgаnіzеd thоughts Наlluсіnаtіоns “Меth bugs” оr thе sеnsаtіоn оf bugs сrаwlіng undеrnеаth thе skіn Раrаnоіа
Completly begins to change you begin to feel like you don't know the person anymore because they are so different, losing weight faster than normal, extra moody and disrespect, eyes look bugged out and animated, if they are sniffing them a sympton would be nose stays runny and constantly sniffing nose, isolation is a big one to because its not something normal people chose to do, being sneaky and lying, you begin to notice the person lose a grip of reality and at that point there is not anything you can say or do to stop using.