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What if treatments don't work?

Discussion in 'Questions About Treatment' started by LifeOrDeath, Nov 4, 2014.

  1. LifeOrDeath

    LifeOrDeath Member

    I knoe someone who may require a treatment for his alcohol addiction. But I am scared that even the treatment will not even work and it will make him feel even more miserable. I don't want to make him feel like he can't be helped.

    Any advice? Thank you.
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2014
  2. Nick W.

    Nick W. Community Listener Community Listener

    I think it's important to understand that treatment isn't going to "cure" him. Treatment is a tool that a person who WANTS to stop can use. At the end of the day it's going to be up the addict to decide how far they are willing to travel down the road to sobriety.
  3. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    I agree.

    Treatment will ONLY work for someone who has made a commitment to dump their addiction and live a better, alcohol-free life. If someone is miserable because they gave up an addiction then probably they weren't ready to say goodbye to the drug they were using. So if you think that he'll be miserable then that person probably still has a long way to go before he's ready to face his addiction problem.
  4. zaerine

    zaerine Community Champion

    It is right that aside from the treatments and/or programs, it is important that the person has the determination to be cured. Those will not work if the patient is not trying to help himself as well. Better to have positive outlook and hope that it will be effective.
  5. stariie

    stariie Community Champion

    You have to be supportive and think positive, and be careful so your words don't poison the experience for this person.
    You shouldn't say anything to him about your fears of how the treatment will not work for him. That's not fair. I think that you should keep any doubtful comments to yourself.
    When you talk to him, be supportive and tell him that Yes, you think he can make it, because he can.
    Don't fill his head with doubt and negativity.
  6. OhioTom76

    OhioTom76 Senior Contributor

    Just because someone or some organization puts together some program which supposedly will help people kick drinking or drugs doesn't inherently mean it will work at all, or all the time or even part of the time.

    You raise a good concern, just because the program didn't work for him, doesn't mean he is a failure or didn't put an earnest effort into it. Some of these people running these programs get a little too "proud" of their organization or treatment methods that they dump all the blame back on to the person seeking help when it doesn't work.

    If he is interested in trying the program, I would say be supportive of him if he gives it a good shot but it doesn't work out. Be proud of him for trying, and talk with him to help him identify why the program didn't work for him.

    That's like trying to get an overweight vegetarian to go on a paleo diet. It's not for everyone and it wont work for everyone.
  7. maryannballeras

    maryannballeras Senior Contributor

    The person who's taking the treatment should be mature enough to accept that he, himself, also needs to work on the situation to get clean. If the treatment won't work, don't be discouraged, there's still a lot of things that you can do to help an addicted person.
  8. DancingLady

    DancingLady Community Champion

    If the person wants to get clean, treatment will work, but they have to want it badly enough to put for the effort to stop drinking and deal with life issues and make changes that need to be made. It's a process and it's hard work. If he doesn't believe it will work, it probably won't because he has mentally already decided he is going to fail. You have to go into it deciding that you will succeed.
  9. geegee

    geegee Active Contributor

    I agree with Nick W. It's not something that's supposed to cure. Treatments are tools. And treatments don't work the same on different people. There's a lot of factors to consider. If he can't make it work with one treatment, doesn't mean another method won't be helpful. The recovery process isn't easy, and no one said he won't fail, the important thing is to stand back up after a fall. :)
  10. karmaskeeper

    karmaskeeper Community Champion

    Treatments only work for those who are truly willing, and ready to get clean. Even then there is no way of knowing that the person will stay clean. It truly is a one day at a time process. Relapses happen, and that doesn't mean just give up. Get back on the wagon as soon as possible make sure a support system is in place.
  11. jackslivi

    jackslivi Active Contributor

    I agree with everyone here. Treatments are only for if the person wants help. They should find support groups first though. That way, they do not feel alone and they actually have people who have been there. I think treatments do work and sadly, relapse is SOMETIMES part of the process. A lot of people think that they are just going to be fine right away and that they won't ever relapse. That does happen and it is so awesome for those people that it does happen to but a lot of times that doesn't happen. They are in pain and it is hard to control your urges. It's all a process but with support they are get through it. One day at a time.
  12. karmaskeeper

    karmaskeeper Community Champion

    My brother relapsed, and I don't personal believe he will ever get sober again. He stopped drinking on his own. He went pretty much cold turkey. Sober a year and a half we were all so proud of him. Then he started back drinking.

    I know from personally experience that starting back really blows your self esteem down. As the saying goes you are your on worst enemy. Well that really applys to a person that has relapsed. I truly pray that maybe one day he will give it up for good.
  13. sammy

    sammy Active Contributor

    I think that the majority of addicts can be helped - at least in the short term - if they commit to the program.

    Long term - I think the chance for relapse is always going to be there. I think it also depends on how long the person was addicted and possibly how young they are when they seek treatment. As I have aged, I definitely see that I have become way more set in my ways and I imagine that's true for many others.
  14. kevinkimers

    kevinkimers Community Champion

    My father went to treatment and it did not work. It does not always work the first time, and for some it does not work at all. However, you can't think that way. You have to be positive and supportive through the whole process. I always like to say: As long as we breath there is hope. Keep that in mind. It may take several trips or different types of treatments before they quit. The first step is getting them to acknowledge they have the problem in the first place and they have to want to quit. You can force them to do it.
  15. JoshPosh

    JoshPosh Community Champion

    For any treatment to work he has to want it for himself. That is the only way it's going to work. If he does successfully come out of treatment then it's going to be his supporting cast that makes sure he doesn't fall prey to addiction once again.
    Nick W. likes this.
  16. Onionman

    Onionman Active Contributor

    I think avoiding treatments simply because they might not work is probably a little defeatist. If anything, it may end up having to be trial and error to work out which treatment works best for him. One size does not fit all so it's about finding one (eventually) that works for him. And as others have said, it shouldn't be seen as a 'cure' or a magic wand.
    Nick W. likes this.
  17. jeremy2

    jeremy2 Community Champion

    You got to have confidence that the treatment will help your friend and you will have to convince him likewise. There's no point in getting scared before your friend gets treated and after all,treatment never killed anyone and besides, your friend's condition will most likely deteriorate without treatment.
  18. notodrugs

    notodrugs Community Listener Community Listener

    First off, don't worry about things that haven't happened yet. Though it may seem a possibility, try to be more optimistic and encouraging of that person. Give your support and motivation the best way that you can. If you feel off about it when it has not even happened yet, he will feel your feelings and might even think he is hopeless.

    HOWEVER, do not blame yourself if it does happen according to your perception. It will always be him who'll be accountable for his own recovery. If he wants to be clean, he will be because he wills it. Good luck to you!
  19. Nick W.

    Nick W. Community Listener Community Listener

    I think it's important to understand that different approaches are going to work for different people. There is no one way to deal with addiction. It may take some trial and error. Support the person, and don't support the addiction.
  20. bourge_21

    bourge_21 Senior Contributor

    That's a very good advice Mr. Nick. And it takes a long time for recovery, well it really depends on the nature of addiction and the will of the addict though. But one thing is for sure: they need serious attention and support.
    Nick W. likes this.