@courage53
Good morning. Thank you for this update. I'm super glad to hear your optimism and that you've picked up the book the new codependency. I definitely think you'll get a lot out of that book, as it helped me out a lot. Also I think that you'll get some much-needed support at the meeting. I was totally nervous too the first couple times I went, but I found a group of people who were really welcoming.
I'm glad that you are seeing that you are responsible for your life and he is responsible for his. It's one thing to be supportive of someone who is making an effort at creating a better life for themselves, but it's another to stay in a toxic or miserable relationship with someone who is not willing. Kudos to you for embarking on this new Journey for yourself.
There's a book called intimacy without responsibility that I really like. I'm going to post a little paragraph that really speaks to me. I hope it speaks to you as well.
{By Wendyne Limber}
"I Am Here On This Earth For My Own Soul's Evolution - Not To Take Care Of You
Love is not about taking care of someone else. Even though taking care of someone else could be rewarding, it usually becomes a burden sooner or later.
Caretaking can become a disease. Most caretakers become martyrs and eventually become sick or addicted to something to take away the pain. When I care-take someone else, I get to not take care of myself. If I am caretaking, YOU are what I am always thinking about. I begin to worry, control, manipulate and hold in my feelings or I become angry and hurtful. Either way, it does not work and I am not whole.
I am here on this earth for my own soul's evolution. I am here to take care of ME. And, I will let YOU take care of yourself. This does not mean that I will not help you or support you. I will figure out HOW to do that in the healthiest way that serves us both. Today I commit to my journey."
Click to expand...