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Will a meth addict ever change?

Discussion in 'Methamphetamine / Meth' started by shindiggermate, Jun 4, 2015.

  1. Mara

    Mara Community Champion

    Anyone can change for the better, even addicts. My older brother has totally kicked the habit. But it took a lot of will power for him to do it. And even though he has recovered, he isn’t the same anymore. He has somewhat become paranoid (not on a dangerous level though). And his speech is slurred. I have to make him repeat the words that he’s saying for me to be able to understand them (but I think this is because of his alcoholism. He’s recovered from this as well).

    So yeah, your husband still has a chance. A slim one but it’s better than nothing. BUT he should have himself rehabilitated, Promises are just words. They mean nothing if he wouldn’t act on it. He should do something about it now before it’s too late.
  2. 6up

    6up Community Champion

    Anybody can change from abusing any drug. Jail acts as another form of rehab. He will learn that he did you wrong because of you trying to help him. Give him a chance, after jail one is supposed to change his or her behavior.
  3. Familyfirst

    Familyfirst Member

  4. Hiraeth

    Hiraeth Active Contributor

    The thing with any kind of chemical drug is that it alters your brain activity and system as a whole. You can blame the person for taking the drug but after a point, you cant blame them for wanting it. It's not their fault anymore. Their body craves it, so much so that everything else that might have been important to them will become lean before their hunger to get the next hit. And that hunger is really hard to overcome. I don't understand why addicts are thrown into jail, it doesn't do them or the society any good. You might try motivating your husband. It's not just him. Being an addict yourself, I think you need to seek help from friends and peers in finding out things to make your life better and happier. That way your children will be happy and maybe your husband will have enough before him to help him fight to stay clean. But whether you should take this chance or not, is entirely your call.
  5. doatk22

    doatk22 Community Champion

    If he is abusing you, you should strongly consider getting your own place if you can, or making him leave because you have two children and that will greatly effect them. Even if they never saw it happening, they can sense the emotions of the parents in the home. You have to think about the effect this all will have on your kids. You don't want them to grow up broken because your man has issues. I really hope he gets help. What gets him back into that temptation? Does he have friends that provide the drugs to him? Whatever is linking him to the addiction needs to be cut out.
  6. LeonasSword

    LeonasSword Active Contributor

    Inappropriately the figures on fruitful rehab of drug addicts is unhappy. Well over 71% stay hooked. So the odds are he will never alteration. Your thoughts are great and if it gives you more ease to have the thoughts and that comfort can offset the reality of your life with an addict, then hold on to your imaginings. But cold-blooded, composed advice would be to leave him now. Don't delay till he gets more fierce or damages the kids.
  7. vegito12

    vegito12 Community Champion

    It will take time and effort as he is suffering from the addiction and it is causing him to be violent and the kids can be affected from seeing this and you need to be away from him for sometime, and be there for the children and take care of them. I reckon he needs to see what his actions are causing to others and may change someday and turn his life around which will require support and motivation as well, and will need help along the way to fight the addiction. It is important to keep the children and yourself safe as his actions are causing stress and not a good way to live,as you don't know what mood he can be in each day as it changes.
  8. Paul

    Paul Member

    Research in to labeling theory would contradict your statement. An easy example of how this works is in studies where children are randomly assigned as "average" or "gifted" and then placed in a classroom in which the teacher is told who is gifted or average (keep in mind these labels were randomly assigned and had nothing to do with the child's cognitive abilities) the children labeled as gifted actually progressed significantly faster than the other children.

    The same can apply to addiction. If a meth addict is told that they have a 90% chance of failing at getting clean then that is the mindset in which they are entering treatment. If they are told that they probable screwed themselves for life, that too is going to alter their perception and set them up for failure.

    While repeated exposure to high levels of methamphetamine has been shown to cause changes to the dopaminergic system, reward pathways, much of this research is not entirely ecologically valid as it does not include all other factors that would contribute to the outcome of a person with a meth problem getting clean. The brain has also been proven highly adaptable to trauma and other physiological changes. Perception is more powerful than some "re wiring " of certain brain systems. Keep telling a person with a substance abuse disorder that they have a snowballs chance in hell of recovery and that is exactly what they will have.

    Reduction of stigma, unbiased presentation of research, and objective education are key to reducing prevalence rates of addiction in society.

    Of course it goes without saying none of what I stated excuses or condones behaviors of the addict, just criticizing the programming of a failure complex into those seeking treatment
  9. Psyduck

    Psyduck Active Contributor

    It actually depends from individual to individual. Some would change and some won't. The choice is yours. If you see the person changing anytime soon, then stay. If you don't see that possible, then it's time to leave.
  10. It's very possible for people to change, but I have yet to see it happen. Meth addiction is a roller coaster of rehab and addiction. My best advice is to get your children out of hell while they're still young, since the worst outcome is them becoming addicts themselves.
  11. sthrngypsy

    sthrngypsy Member

    I went through something similar to what you are going through - my ex did not ever hit me, but he did things like scream at me in the street in front of the neighbors, called me every bad name you can think of, let his friends take my car when I was asleep to do God knows what in, let them steal from me..all my jewelry..my iPhone.....could my ex change? Sure. Does he want to? Nope.


    I finally left him because of his daughter. She's been through a lot and been around a lot of things she should never have seen at her age. I did not want her to think it was ok for a man to treat a woman like he treated me. That God forbid she would grow up thinking this was normal and healthy. I left when she was 12. I hope some day she understands. She just turned 14 and I could not be there. I had to move quite a few states away because that was where I had a friend to take me in. But also because I have always and will always love him and the only thing I can do about that is remove myself and put miles between us.

    I do have a friend who was married to a man who was addicted to meth. She is smarter and stronger than I am and left him. Now he is clean and has been for some time but it is too late for him to have a chance with her. No way would she ever consider taking him back.

    Don't count on jail doing anything either. I'm told that drugs are as easy to get in jail as out of jail, possibly easier. My ex has a friend who goes to jail every year over unpaid parking tickets. Stays in for about 3 months and gets out not owing the state any money. You get a $50 credit per day for being in jail in AL. Crazy huh? Anyway he gets out every year and goes right back to what he was doing.
  12. tasha

    tasha Community Listener Community Listener

    Sometimes you have to take a walk outside of your life and look at it from there to see that you are in the wrong place and that your life can be better if you let it. There are good people out there and a life that does not need to have all of this trouble in it, a life that sets you free and allows you to laugh and feel good rather than worry about all of this, leave and start over!!!
  13. amin021023

    amin021023 Community Champion

    everyone can change even the drug addicts, your children will look up at you so be strong in their presence. try to look at the positives of life and focus on the welfare of your little angels.
  14. danjon

    danjon Senior Contributor

    It's been interesting reading this thread because, so far, I haven't had much experience with meth users as it isn't a particularly popular drug here in the UK. But like people have said, anyone can change, but it does seem that meth is a stubborn drug to shift. I hope your husband manages to pull through for you and your children's sake.
  15. tasha

    tasha Community Listener Community Listener

    People can change if they want to and it is a hard road to recovery as well as the fact that recovery is a permanent thing in your life forever. People have to want to get better and it makes it easier to recover but some do not want to get better or they are so far gone that they cant.
  16. kgord

    kgord Community Champion

    Living in the same home with someone who is violent is extremely toxic. I think for the safety and sake of your children you need to get away. Maybe, your husband can wake up and realize what he is lost, and get clean and sober, but as the other posters have said..he may never return to the person he was before the addiciton.
  17. Andy_Lothbrok

    Andy_Lothbrok Member

    I think he can change, the main thing is, does he want to change? Meth takes a hold of people and it is very very hard to break that hold, because often the will is overcome and the person will fall back into using. I have found that a major help to overcoming meth, and most other addictions, is to get him away from his friends and people he knows who use and sell to him This can be hard and can mean moving away, but if your marriage is worth saving, its worth trying. Many people come out of rehab not planning on using again, however they get back to their social groups and just being around people who are using, tempts them back. This is the main cause of the 90% failure rate of rehab.
  18. Kyndalion

    Kyndalion Member

    It takes a very long time for a meth addict to not be a meth addict.
    Meth is addicting not only physically but mentally. It is more mentally addicting than anything. It has to do with anxiety and a feeling that they are overwhelmed. Meth is used to get more things done, to keep up. So, they can change. You need to treat the original problem causing the drug use.
  19. Widow

    Widow Member

    I've read quite a few of these replies but not all of them. I have to say that the ones that say a meth addict can never change are extremely bothersome. I can understand not wanting to give someone false hope but you can't say that an addict will never change. While it's true that some never do, there are plenty that overcome the addiction!

    I was on meth for several years. I didn't do it because I had some horrible life or I was attempting to deal with a problem. I did it for the same reason I tried every other drug that I've used. I was told how great it would make me feel. I started out simply smoking it from time to time until a group of my friends were shooting it up. Once I shot up, everything changed. All I wanted was to be high and the high lasted forever! I'd seen others nearly overdose. I'd seen friends go basically psychotic. One particular friend heard voices telling him to kill himself and he stabbed himself in the chest numerous times. Thankfully he lived but he did spend several years in a mental institution. I saw people literally pick holes in their face or on their arms. I saw once healthy people become thin with hallow eyes. You would think seeing all of that would make me want to quit but I didn't. I just always knew I wouldn't be like them. I did however start stealing from stores and returning the merchandise in order to buy my next fix. I stole endless amounts of money from my parents. I'd stay awake for days not eating and literally forget to feed my own children. I'm ashamed at the things I was willing to do to feel that high.

    I had stopped many times but once I was around anyone who did it, the cravings would come back. I would want to feel that euphoric high one more time! Unfortunately I would no longer remember the amount that it had taken for me to reach that point. I'd end up using multiple times until I had that old familiar feeling. Once I had it, I wanted it again! Eventually though I did end up quitting. It did take the threat of me losing the most important thing in my life which was two of my children. It also took me not talking to or hanging out with ANYONE that did it.

    Recovering isn't easy but it definitely is possible! I hope your husband finds the help that he needs. I hope he finds his own reason for not wanting to do it any longer. I wish you the best!
  20. Tremmie

    Tremmie Community Champion

    If i were this woman I'd really walk away from the guy... quitting meth is so hard. Most of the people I've meth haven't been able to quit it, some have even died. It's such a horrible drug, and once you start using it you become its slave with no free will, no love or care for your family... no anything. All they think is getting the next fix, it's horrible. I mean, come on, some of them even lose their teeth pretty quick... they don't care about themselves, why would they care about anyone else?

    Of course some people have managed to quit meth, but they did it because they took the decision and stick to it. It is possible, but it's so hard... you really need to really want it. You just can't force someone to actually want it.