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will my boyfriend ever change?

Discussion in 'Share Your Story Here' started by lgp_1011, Nov 21, 2016.

  1. lgp_1011

    lgp_1011 Member

    I met my boyfriend around 7 months ago. He went into the relationship addicted to meth. i had no idea. For the past 7 months my life has been living hell. some weeks it was great. He had already came down off of meth and he was somewhat happy. Then it got a lot worse. He couldn't stay away from it. He became violent. Multiple nights getting hit and told his life getting ruined was all my fault. I just wonder if he will ever stay away and if he does will he still look at me the same. "The problem his lifes ruined". Will he still be violent? He has gotten kicked out of his grandmas. He his on probation. Im begging him to go to A treatment center and he is more than willing. Im just scared to stick around to help when ive gotten choked out and beaten up. Is that the drug or is that him just being a shitty person?? OPINIONS PLEASE!! i cant start a life with a person that is just abusive sober or on meth.
  2. deanokat

    deanokat Community Organizer Community Listener

    @lgp_1011... Welcome to the community and thanks for sharing. I'm sorry to hear about your boyfriend's struggles and how they are affecting your relationship. Loving someone who struggles with addiction can be an incredibly challenging roller coaster ride.

    Whether or not your boyfriend will change is hard to predict. Can he get clean and sober and stay that way? Yes. Will it be easy for him? No. But if he's willing to accept help and work hard to stay in recovery, it can be done. The question is whether or not he is willing to make that commitment. Unfortunately, there's no way to predict that.

    The fact that he's been violent and abusive toward you pains me. I can't tell you if that's a result of his drug use or if it's a part of his personality. But I do know this: You deserve to live a happy, healthy, safe life. You should always put yourself and your well-being at the top of your priority list. You shouldn't have to live in fear of what may happen next.

    There are some really good books out there that may help you understand your boyfriend's addiction better. I wrote about some of them in a blog, and here's the link:

    6 Essential Books for Those with an Addicted Loved One

    The Beyond Addiction book is especially good and I would recommend that you pick it up and read it. It's full of really good, helpful information.

    Again, remember that YOU are the most important person in your life. Always make the important decisions in your life with that in mind.

    We are here to help and support you however we can, so please don't hesitate to reach out whenever you need to. In the meantime, I'm sending you lots of positive vibes and hugs full of love and hope...because you deserve them.