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Your behind the scenes versus someone else's highlight reel

Discussion in 'Sobriety Tips and Inspiration' started by kassie1234, Jul 30, 2015.

  1. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion


    How often have you heard this saying?

    I have a tendency to do exactly what they say to NOT do. It's so easy to see someone else's life and assume it's perfect because that's all you see at surface level - and you compare your own behind the scenes to their 'flawless life'.

    We all battle. We all struggle. We all have fears, doubts, concerns, anxieties.

    We're human.

    It's 100% okay, and for that matter 100% normal not to be perfect - because what is perfect, anyway? It's mainly an illusion we create in our own heads!

    Be proud of who you are and how far you've come, and relish in the beauty that is your own behind the scenes!
  2. CallipygianGamine

    CallipygianGamine Community Champion

    I’ve been prone to that as well. It was kind of what led me to a bit of a bad social media habit; at some point I’d stopped using it to communicate and started using it to post things to impress the people in my life. Seeing everyone else’s highlight reel made me feel like I needed to keep up.

    The truth is, we rarely ever know someone else’s behind-the-scenes. I’ve still got a lot of crap in mine, to be sure. But since I stopped living to post, instead making an effort to improve my life and to live for its own sake, a wonderful thing happened. Things improved, slowly but surely. So now it doesn’t bother me as much as it used to. Not only that, I don’t feel such a desire to share my life on social media, despite the fact that it looks and feels more like a highlight reel than it used to. It’s for me and no one else.
    kassie1234 likes this.
  3. kassie1234

    kassie1234 Community Champion

    I love how you said that it's for you and no one else. The whole "life on display" type feeling can honestly get to be a bit of a pain in the butt - and that goes for whether life is good of bad, or somewhere in between.
    CallipygianGamine likes this.
  4. dyanmarie25

    dyanmarie25 Community Champion

    Absolutely true. We are all just humans. We all have flaws, we make mistakes, we ruin things, and we make bad decisions. It's all part of being alive. No one is perfect. We are all battling something in life. Everyone is just good at hiding their problems, but that doesn't mean they're not in trouble.

    And yes, we have to be proud of who we are, no matter how big or small our accomplishments are. We may have failed along the way, but at least, we tried.
    kassie1234 likes this.
  5. CallipygianGamine

    CallipygianGamine Community Champion

    Agreed. I feel like sharing every little moment in life can diminish the importance of the significant ones. It’s kind of why I stopped sharing so much. Just because I think something is pretty cool, that doesn’t mean everyone I know would see it that way. I’m not a celebrity or a tastemaker, after all.
  6. Rainman

    Rainman Community Champion

    Sometimes people stress themselves up because they compare themselves against others. The fact that other people could be doing better, having fewer struggles, etc could push the person doing the observing to push themselves beyond their limits to "outdo the Joneses." Failure to do so would end in frustration and what would follow is a descent down the dark path.

    “Comparison is the death of joy.”
    ― Mark Twain
  7. missbishi

    missbishi Community Champion

    What a great quote! It instantly makes me think of social media - when we compare the things people tell us about their "fantastic" lives with our boring mundane existences. Of course, all we are seeing is the edited highlights and really, their lives are just as humdrum as ours!
  8. AFKATafcar

    AFKATafcar Community Champion

    A big problem with human beings in general is that we compare ourselves to others and their situations, even though that's the exact wrong thing to do. There's no way to know someone else's circumstances or what they're going through, and comparison only works to harm our own minds in countless ways. Throwing the tendency to compare ourselves to others out the door can come with countless benefits.